With Halloween out of the way and only two months left in the year, I can’t help but think…
We live in a world obsessed with templates and predefined paths. But growth doesn’t come from rigid systems or one-size-fits-all solutions — at least, not for all of us. It comes from daring to show up as we are and stumbling along the way as many times as it takes. It could happen once, or it could take a lifetime.
My own path has never fit into one frame or another. It has been shaped by success and failure, good days and bad days, ups and downs. It has been shaped by science and art, structure and intuition, thinking and feeling. Each experience, whether light or dark, has added layers, texture, and depth.
Where am I going with this post, you may ask? I’m moving in many directions — and you’ll have to find yours, buried somewhere in here. I write, veiling and unveiling, just as I do in my art. While wandering through my thoughts, a couple things surfaced.
“If everybody could find a good therapist, somebody to talk to, that would make the world a little bit better: Lived Experiences of Depression and Overcoming Depression in Midlife” — that was the final title of my recent dissertation. It was overwhelming to discover how many people, just like me, had negative experiences with therapists, simply because no one size fits all.
For people without a mental illness, a better alternative to therapy can be coaching — that was another finding from my research. Coaching doesn’t belong to a single school of thought. It draws from multiple disciplines — psychology, education, management, philosophy, spirituality, and even art. There is no single formula, no fixed path, no one-size-fits-all approach.
Coaching, much like art, refuses to fit into a single frame. Its beauty lies in the dance between structure and spontaneity, listening and responding, knowing and not knowing. There is no universal formula — and that’s exactly the point. Every person, every story, every moment calls for a different kind of presence.
Coaching is just like making art. You start with a concept and an intention, but you have to stay open to what unfolds. Sometimes the process surprises you, challenges you, or even unsettles you. But that’s where transformation happens — in the dialogue, in the co-creation, in the willingness to let go of control and simply trust the process. In knowing when to hold space — and when to hold the mirror.
In both art and coaching, the self becomes the main tool. Life itself is not a plan to follow, but a canvas to explore. No formula, no map, no single path — only presence, curiosity, and the courage to keep moving forward.